



Last Sunday, I was listening to a song called "the Other Way". It reminds me of a saying that goes, "Don't look back, you're not going that way". It's true how painful memories linger and still affect and get the best of a person every now and then. It's mostly inner fears, maybe fear to make the same mistake again or just from over-analying things, which spiral into something ridiculous and makes you want to run at the first sign of trouble.
Yesterday, I wrote and delivered a Eulogy for our deceased FASEA president Maria Padua Fontanilla. It's funny how we share the same middle name. I thought that it will be hard to write a eulogy for someone I do not know that well. But, after hearing everyone else's Eulogy, I was glad that I had a chance to tell the world how good she is. I talked to some of her close friends while writing the Eulogy and that's how I learned that she was such a kind and generous woman who have helped many. I also realized how short and fragile life is and how we can be immortal through the memories we leave behind. When we do good to others, they will never forget that and at the same time, you please God for living your life according to His will. It's nice to have an "assurance" that whatever it is that's waiting for us afterlife, it will be a good one... Whether you call it Karma or Reincarnation, I know that every good things that we do will be rewarded both here on Earth and in Heaven.

Last week, I was at my friend's house in dowtown San Jose after watching Mason Jennings at the Blank Club. Then, Sunday morning, I was at Carmel and attended a mass at Mission San Carlos (the fourth Mission we've visited). Carmel-by-the-sea reminds me of one of Thomas Kinkade's paintings. I love the Cyprus trees, the tide pools, and the whole scenery at the 17-mile drive to Pacific Grove. The light house, Monarch Butterflies' Sanctuary, and the Lover's Point at Pacific Grove was awesome. Then, I had dinner at a sports-diner place called Britanica Arms in Monterey after walking the downtown shops and areas and checking out the Fisherman's Wharf. It was foggy and misty that night. I remember hearing the sea lions and the yachts but not really seeing them since even the lights are blurry from a distant.
This week has been a little rough for me. Our FASEA (http://www.geocities.com/jptablante/FASEA.html) president died early this week and I was not emotionally ready when it all happened. Then, my bike got stolen that night. Thursday, I got toxin-poisoning from a cold can of coffee that I had for lunch. It's so ironic how something that you like so much (ex: coffee) can hurt you real bad. I felt alone that night while I was in pain and having a fever. Can't call my mom because I don't want to worry her. My dad dropped by but he can't stay because of my step-mom. It's amazing how I was able to pull myself together the next day to go to work. Thank God I started throwing up that morning, and ofcourse, it's the coffee I saw and smelled in the puke. I threw up on a biohazard bag in one of the labs where no one is around to hear me. The third time I threw up was after the lunch time FASEA meeting and I think that did it. I still feel weak that Friday night but I thought that I owe it to myself to go out with some friends. Unfortunately, I didn't like the new crowd they brought but overall, it was a fun night.
Today, I went to Napa and Sonoma with couple of my friends. It was a little misty and foggy in the morning but it was so perfect, a much needed retreat. It felt like a 6-hour dawn. I was able to clear my head and feel strong. It's nice to breathe some fresh air at Napa. I wish I can take it home with me. On our way back, we stopped by Pinoy Pinay at Vallejo and met Jeffrey Quizon, Filipino celebrity and son of famous comedian, Dolphy.




It's kind of weird how I met at least three people with the same birth date as me in the same year: Claire, Claudia, and Jasmine's baby. Anyway, the trip to Grand Canyon was awesome! Check out pictures I've taken at (http://www.friendster.com/jocelyn1979). I flew to Las Vegas on a Saturday (~1 hr) flight and spend the day in Vegas. I had to go on the New York New York Manhattan rollercoaster first thing in the morning because they're only open until noon on Saturdays. It was great! It was $12/ride but got a $4 off coupon and it was worth it. The ride was long enough and had at least two loops and couple of drops. I liked it a LOT! The rides at the Stratosphere's (X Scream and couple of others) are kind of expensive for me plus you have to pay to get up the tower, where they have the rides. Checked out the Bellagio's water show, watched the top-of-the-hour show at Caesar's palace, GameWorks, the new Wynn hotel, Madame Toussand's wax museum, Rainforest, etc. At night, there's the Excalibur's outdoor Pirate show. I was hoping we'll get to check out 55th floor's Ghostbar at Palms hotel and see Las Vegas' panoramic view at night but, didn't have the time. The girls at Coyote Ugly @ NY NY are hot, hot hot!
Next day, we stop by Hoover Dam on our way to West of Grand Canyon (~3 hrs drive). There's a 14-mile dirt road that we had to drive to get to Skywalk. We paid $75 for the tour package that includes walking the Skywalk (no cameras allowed), couple of shows, and a traditional meal. I think it's kinda expensive but, oh well. South Rim was ~ 5 hrs from West GC. We campled at Angel's Bright campground and hiked the Angel's Bright trail the following day. Unfortunately, we were not able to secure the campsite nor got a backcountry permit to camp on one of the campsites by the Colorado River so we have to do a roundtrip that same day. We had a good view of the river at Plateau Point but we didn't make it all the way to the river, maybe next time.

When I was at UC Davis, I joined a couple of the Fil-Am groups: Pilipino Americans in Science and Engineering (PASE) and Filipino Association for Health Careers (FAHC). My emailbox is often cluttered up with newsletters and announcements. I'm always excited to check them out. But, I didn't stay with FAHC that long... must be their email greetings ~ "Welcome back to the Fall Quarter, FAHC'ers!" *uhhH. What did you call me?!#@!
Everyone is looking forward for a change and that's what future-president Barack Obama is all about. He just has this power to motivate and bring hope, which is what the people can really use at this time. What we need is a new perspective and a new way of living. Gone with the old, rotten system and on to a new beginning.



Cheers! This is a picture of LitZa, AJ, Lorena, y moi when my boyfriend's band (Grand Via) played at Poleng's in SF. AJ is one of the few new close friends I've made since I moved to Richmond. He's such a great, cool guy that you can always count on when you need someone to talk to or hang out with. Unfortunately, he works crazy hours on his job to keep up with his mortgage payments that he barely has time to meet people or find a nice girlfriend. I tried to hook him up a few times with some lady friends but didn't work out because he has to work on weekends (when he's supposed to be out on a date).


Each time I put on some make-up, my nieces always have a grin on their faces because they knew that I'll doll them up with glitters & colors in their faces, too. But, this night is different... we just want to be barbarians and Amazons and celebrate Halloween a 'lil early. So, we put a ton of old make up on our face and roared the night away!
We have a new addition to our family - my nephew, John Peter. I love his cute little face! My brother gets mad at me whenever I call him Mickey. You should see him smiLe, he looks like Mickey Mouse! Okay, stop it! Can't wait until he starts crawling, walking, and running and I'll have more kids to play with. Weee! Hey, don't get me wrong, I'm just a kid at heart.
I feel the necessity to have a full control on both my heart and my brain. These are the trickiest and the most mysterious, spontaneous, involuntary entities that I often find myself struggling to deal with. They're a part of the battle within on top of the everyday reality that I have to face. My brain often knows what's logical and right but my heart is too stubborn and impatient to bear with the pain and other consequences of doing what is right.
I've always been fascinated with rock formations, mostly those from volcanic eruptions. No wonder I easily fell in love with rock climbing. Rocks have their own uniqueness from texture, color, strength, composition, and where they can be found. I've always associated rocks/pebbles/stones with strength. Even "Narda" (Philippine 'Wonder Woman' character)have to swallow a piece of rock to transform into "Darna!". And what do they call diamond engagement rings? A giant piece of rock! Rock rocks! So, last Sunday, we were at Emeryville marina and decided to mess around with smaller pieces of rocks and play "Jenga" with it. Awesome! Can't believe I was able to pile them up that high... check out the base, too! Staring at that piece of art, I can't help appreciate the beauty a unison makes. That stack of rocks is definitely fragile but it looks amazing from a distance ~ the incredible balance and how each piece supports the other. No matter how much stress and pressure are placed by gravity and wind on those rocks at that moment, the beauty of it takes all those worries away. In reality, balance, unity, and harmony in our lives can definitely hush away any sorrow, pain, and other imperfections. Positivity will always radiate the most and bring enough light to overcome darkness/negativities.
We have this small sideyard that's right enough to have a BBQ with friends but small enough that it requires very little maintenance. My mom helped me a lot with growing flowers and plants since she has the green thumb. I found some bouncy critters and some garden decors on sale at Joann's and they're so cute! I hang them to an old solid frame, which used to be a bunkbed ladder. It's so fun to watch them go crazy and bounce all over the place with their springy coils, especially when it's windy outside. It looks like they're jumping around and dancing around the plants.
The 70% off sale at JoAnn's Craft store gave me an excuse to finally get something for my mom's old metal arch. It's been sitting there alone for a long time and I know that it's going to take a while before I can grow long vines around it and yet, it might not be strong enough to support vines. So, for now, I got these long plastic swags to hang around it to make it look pretty. It really brightens up the space and makes it look more alive. I used a plastic chair to start hanging those flowery swags from the top of the arch. After I finished, the chair seems to look better in that corner so, I decided to leave it there. It looks more serene now than ever! Later on, I found a red barn-like birdhouse, which I sat on the green chair to complete that area.
It's so nice to chill in the garden after work and enjoy the long summer days. My roommates and I have been planning to have a BBQ party for months now. But, we always end up going to someone else's BBQ. Fortunately, I was able to throw a little party during a boxing fight (Pacquiao VS. Morales) one time and that was really fun!
Another thing I found is this colorful beaded lizard. It's about 1.5 feet in length and it looks really shiny when the sun hits it but, I can't find a perfect place for it to hang in my super white room! So, I'll probably keep on moving it around from wall-to-wall with a push pin until I find "the perfect spot" for it.